Eleanor and Park and Romeo and Juliet

I forgot just how much I loved this book. The last post I wrote was from what I remembered from when I had read it before, and then some really generic stuff about poverty that I found on the internet- partly because I forgot just how much I enjoyed this book the first time I read it.

    The characters are so real, so complex, so nuanced for a young adult book. The situations that they are thrown in are so ordinary and so relatable- tragic and horible in some ways- but not so much as to immediately stand out as something affecting or unlivable. But then you see them as individuals and you see them being shaped, and attempting to shape, all that is going on around them, and it is powerful.

    I love Eleanor. I love Park. I love what Park does for Eleanor, for cynical Eleanor who finds things such as-"Love at first sight" and "Romeo and Juliet" too good to be true.

"Romeo and Juliet are just two rich kids who've always gotten every little thing they want. And now, they think they want each other."
"They're in love…" Mr. Stessman said, clutching his heart.
"They don't even know each other."
"It was love at first sight."
"It was 'Oh my God, he's so cute' at first sight… it's Shakespeare making fun of love." (10.41-45)

    Here is Eleanor, this girl who feels- as I kind of see it- as if she is somehow extraneous. Unnecessary. Every moment I spent reading Eleanors story, and how lowly she thought of herself, something got to me. She was so lonely. Here is this girl overlooked, and here she is trying to convince herself that she deserves to be seen- while dealing with people telling her again and again, through the cruelty and thoughtlessness of their actions, that it is best for her to just be invisible.

    Her mother is involved with her own life, she has sort have gone into a survival mode herself- one that just does not have space for Eleanor as a person. Really, at one point it didnt have space for Eleanor at all. What it must have been like for Eleanor, to be rejected in such a way by probably the one person she hopes to be her steady lifeline, and then to come home and realize that- the family went on fine without her- that she maybe really wasnt needed at all.

    But when Eleanor walked in the house, it was like her siblings didn't recognize her. (4.3)

    That is why when Park comes, when Park starts even just being kind to her- it is hard for her to take- because it is hard for her to trust it. At one point in the book even she mentions that she knows she would be devestated, and was constantly expecting- constantly on edge- to the possibility of him breaking off his contact. Because she was alone, but with Park, because Park cares about her- Park thinks she matters. And that terrifies her, because if she starts to believe it and then builds herself up with it and something DOES happen- like the friendship deteriorating, it will only mean that there will be farther for her to fall.

Park touched her hands like they were something rare and precious, like her fingers were intimately connected to the rest of her body. Which, of course, they were. It was hard to explain. He made her feel like more than the sum of her parts. (16.7) 

    So she tests him. She gives him bits and pieces, holds much of herself back but not all, to see whether or not he rejects her. And by rejects- I mean rejects her as a person- rejects who she is as a person, who she is trying to be- because if she gives too much, if she trusts him too much and then that goes sour and he does reject her- it might make her feel as if she were worthless.

"Because I'm interested. It's like you've got all these weird barriers set up, like you only want me to have access to this tiny part of you..."
"Yes," she said, crossing her arms. "Barriers. Caution tape. I'm doing you a favor."
"Don't," he said. "I can handle it." (33.51-53)

    But as the book goes on her confidence grows- because Park becomes her light in the dark really. Makes her feel as if she is not alone, that if someone can care about her then maybe there is something worth caring about- no matter her physical appearance, her poverty, any of that. And it is sad that this confidence has to come from Park initially, it is sad that Eleanor is in such a situation that seems to be the case- but the fact that it does grow- and that it is recognizable throughout the book- I think is great, and I think it is what makes this such a good story.